O!NO,MN

YOU CAN PUT THEM IN A PIE

2009-05-13T07:48:00.000-07:00

GAY RULES

2009-02-27T11:02:00.001-08:00

by Jesus circa 20 A.D.

1) gay babies can only come from gay moms
2) gay moms can't have gay sex and conceive
3) gay babies only come from freak gay moms who get pregnant without doin a dude
4) mary was a lesbian

From this logic, one can make some simple assertions:
1) god is gay
2) jesus is gay too! duh
3) if you're gay, then so is your mom, but she never did it with your dad!
4) gay people are holy like jesus

2009-02-20T19:43:00.001-08:00

From the North to the South

2009-02-18T08:44:00.000-08:00

Obama will visit Canada tomorrow to be bombarded with Canadian oil lobbyists trying to sell the Alberta Tar Sand's low-yield oil for U.S. energy consumption.

This is the dirtiest fuel on the planet! The mining and processing of these tar sands has an environmental impact beyond the impact of regular oil and gas.

What will this president of "great change" decide? Will he side with the rights of the Indigenous Peoples who rightfully own this land? Will he consider the Minnesotans, Nebraskans, and Louisianan's downstream? We have to hold Obama accountable for what he said he would do for us. The question is, if he doesn't, then what will the we, the people do?

this makes me happy

2009-02-17T14:29:00.001-08:00

O!NO,MN truly.

2008-09-10T10:46:00.001-07:00

in honor of the anniversary of september 11th

2008-09-03T23:42:00.000-07:00

watch this 9/11 movie:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7E3oIbO0AWE

Workin in a coal mine, goin down town

2008-08-21T08:08:00.000-07:00

That;s right, you bastards, I am officially a pumkin expert, working at Vala's Pumpkin Patch this fall. For those of you who don't know of the patch, it is as close to heaven as one can get within 40 minutes of Omaha.

Abby and I have gone almost every fall for our entire lives. Turkey legs, cider at the food barn, trips through the abandonned mine shaft, haunted houses (but not too haunted, only anamatronically haunted) and of course hayrack rides.

See you this fall motherfuckers. LEt me know if you want a free pass.... I got connections.

from the night of O!NO,MN's conception

2008-08-19T19:32:00.001-07:00

this is an excerpt of a poem-sketch called "I Do Everything With Lesbians" or "Omaha Night Polaroids" from July 3rd, about the night before.

They all work at organic food stores.
They are home-grown, wooden-house, plaid-and-bandana-wearing girls.

They play with big, scrappy, brown or black dogs with pointy ears whose tails whap half-drunk beers.

The Becks takes Mishka in her hands and advises us (while saying that she doesn't like to give advice) to "Always pet your dog's feet.

"Your vet will thank you, and he will know you really love animals."

She is putting little midnight-blue rubber booties on big, black, quiet Mishka.

Leslie and I are keeling over at the sight of it.

Mishka is a real Buddha. We are meeting Siddhartha and it tickles us.

I thought it might become a comic. It laid groundwork. The comic became "Polaroids" for Good Minnesotan (which Abby will also appear in), which is half about Abby and I driving back from Omaha on the 3rd and talking and playing Laurie Anderson, and half about watching the fireworks from the Stone Arch Bridge in Minneapolis with my friend Lauren.
I'll put the comic up as soon as it's done, by the end of the month.

Sedaristic

2008-08-17T16:25:00.000-07:00

The lovely David Sedaris makes drawings. Will someone publish a book of them?

"Recently, instead of signing my name, I’ve been drawing little things in people’s books. You know, just little mementos. Like, I’ve been drawing these old-timey signs and on them I write “Abortions: three dollars.” And I just think I’m hilarious. Sometimes I’ll draw a little knot in the sign to make it look even more quaint. I don’t know why that makes me so happy. This woman, she introduced herself by saying she was very liberal, but she just didn’t want the abortion sign in the front jacket of her new book. So, I asked her, ‘what if I changed it to thirteen dollars [for an abortion]?’ Again, I have no idea why that makes me so happy. I used to draw Abe Lincoln with a bubble coming out of his mouth that says “friendship is a cancer” or an owl saying “I like black people.” This is what happens when you’ve been signing books for nine hours." - interview with The Stranger (which, despite this neat interview, The Seattle P-I is superior to)

This is very relevant to the idea and genesis of this blog because on the drive from Omaha to Minneapolis Abby and I were listening to David -- and the comic I'm making about that journey showed that, but then I replaced him with Laurie (Anderson).

I still love you, though, David.

You will marry me, won't you? I like you better than real people in my real life.

she

2008-08-16T18:48:00.000-07:00

abby's got a lust for blood??
reppin'

this is for the grlz

2008-08-13T23:50:00.001-07:00

while at dreamland faces, kelly came across this.

want more?

also,
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breast_expansion

Memories of the Reverend

2008-08-10T16:43:00.000-07:00

The night was exhausted by those who talk much more than they should. Even those who have importance in speech should be concise. I was supposed to be home sixty minutes ago but the talker my ride and I waited patiently trying my hardest to nod my head in the direction of the speaker.
I spent the evening in the company of my new acquaintance. He was born blind in 1917, about to turn 91 years of age, and beginning the preliminary stages of Alzheimer’s. We sat across from one another, chit chatting in a repetitive circle of questions.
“You go to choich (church)?”
“No, Rev. I don’t.”
“Well, don’t foiget (forget) God.”
Another regular:
“Miss?”
“yes?”
“Do you live here?”
“No Rev. This is your home.” pause…
“Ok. Buh-bye now.”
Perhaps the new circumstances of 24 hour watch had confused the consistency of his life. Ten days before I had been employed to watch over this amourotic nonagenerian, he had been found a block from his home in the middle of the night with no idea where he was going or what he was doing. Several details of the story were omitted I’m sure because I know that his whole life he has slept in nothing but a pajama shirt with his privates to the soft touch of his bedsheets. He stood stooped over in the middle of 24th street, illuminated by a single light post; his baby blue night shirt, his bald head, and his weathered, dangling privates hanging between his toothpick legs. This alarming event had preempted the required round the clock care and therefore employed me as babysitter to the Reverend.

I was thinking about houses

2008-08-07T11:43:00.000-07:00

I was thinking about houses, and my brain matter arrived at the house of the lord. We all know that some people see only brick buildings with sandstone frosting as the houses of the lord, so I suppose he must have a house for every day of the year and then some. But how does he protect his houses? Does he have a super cosmic alarm system, or a barking walrus with a gold chain? I think not, God protects itself, with a padlock and a chainlink fence.

p.s. I am considering the mass production of bumper stickers to be placed on all the mercedes and BMW's of the world, along with the jalopies, any thoughts?

and this from andrew crook.

2008-08-07T11:17:00.000-07:00

clowns for molly

2008-08-07T10:18:00.000-07:00

some stream of consciousness clowning.

1. H.R. Pufnstuf came to mind first, obviously.

2. mcdonalds ripped off the H. R. Pufnstuf design for some of their own creatures... then I remembered a creepy mcdonalds creation, the hamburger patch. here is one such hamburger.

3. then i looked over and saw andrew reading the onion with this image in it! Synchronicity!

also, this:

Make em laugh, make em laugh, don't you know all the world wants to laugh

2008-08-05T11:42:00.000-07:00

So, I was thinking, "Batman" has suprised us all, being a movie that everyone on this blog appreciated more that we all thought.

Well, I was on Entertainment Weekly's website this morning (as part of my job) and I saw this. I was thinking we could all do some sort of clown-type post. ou could even do something on the Joker, who isn't a clown, necissarily, but you get my point.

LITTLE GREEN HOUSES

2008-08-05T10:53:00.000-07:00

when worlds collide

2008-08-04T10:53:00.000-07:00

Adrian Tomine's sketchbook drawing of The Man From Another Place (Twin Peaks). From Tomine's Scrapbook.

(the title of this post refers to Abby and Jenny's worlds)

collaboration makes the world silty.

2008-08-03T14:11:00.000-07:00

TINY HAUS

2008-07-31T23:47:00.000-07:00

GO LIVE IN ONE, ABBY'S GONNA!!

drawing credits::
(clockwise from left)
me, abby, ben

And if I ever lose my mouth, all my teeth, north and south

2008-07-30T12:58:00.000-07:00

So I was listening to the above lyrics of a Cat Stevens song the other day and one single image popped into my head that I NEEDED to draw:

I have no idea why, but it jus sort of happened that way.

Next I drew this, because it seem like a logical step.

So when it all came together, I had the image below:

It came out more creepy than I was anticipating. He is supposed to be a very nice character, whoever he is. I didn't realized he creeped me out until it was the middle of the night and I woke up and looked over on my floor and saw him staring at me. Very unsettlin'.

So there it is, my lastest something or other. Enjoy.

P.S. I am working on a comic that involved people answering a question I have posted on my blog, if you wouldn't mind checking it out and answering it. THANKSSSS!

WANNA FEEL GOOD NO MATTER WHAT

2008-07-29T21:41:00.000-07:00

THIS IS THE SONG THAT MAKES ME FEEL SO GOOD, NO MATTER WHAT
(even if i'm having a bad day / moment, like right now)
THERE'S NO WRONG TIME TO PLAY THIS SONG

GET DOWN ON IT!!!!!

Nate Denver makes me feel good about myself

2008-07-26T11:51:00.000-07:00

Be sure to check my blog later this week to read my Sak Sally and Nate Denver story. Now, for the goods. This is another Superman that Bob drew me to put on my desk at work:

Next is a Superman that I did for Bob for his birthday present:

So, one might be wondering why Nate Denver made me feel better about myself. Well, you might not know it from looking at my picture, but I actually did look at a picture of Superman to draw that. Well, as it turns out, Nate Denver, an artist I respect, buys books on elephants, and looks at photos of them all the time, and draws dozens of them every day, but I wouldn't necessarily call them "photo realistic."

O!NO!

2008-07-25T15:13:00.000-07:00

This is a picture I found under a sunken ship from about 3,000 years ago. I believe it was Phoenician in origin. Apparently this practice of fishy-massages is not as avant garde as one might imagine.
In prechristian times, the large beast Fladapoli was a fish-like creature who owned a big bowl-spa. He would invite the teeny weeny humans to partake in what they saw as a battle to kill a hefty meal, while its grandness, the undying Fladopoli, found it to be quite pleasing as a ritual removal of dying and increasing scales. The scale of the human, allowed for the scale of the beasty to live in what one might refer to as a mutual relationship, if not an unintentionally harmonius one.

This is my piece of historic evidence I was able to unearth in my research. Where there any parrallels drawn by the onominnow conglomerate?

So two fish walk into a spa...

2008-07-24T11:51:00.000-07:00

Before my eyelids were torn off, the idea of going to a fish spa sounded like a good idea. So the story goes, I was in Seol, looking for a little fun. Wanted to sample some of the local culture, and decided to spring the $8 for the fish spa.

I only remember wading in the water, but then the fish swam through my ears into my brain and I passed out. The owner of the spa had to pull me out. But, in the end, the spa treatment was comped and I saved myself the $8.

Time machine, time machine, traveling through tiiiiime. Thank you.

2008-07-22T16:55:00.000-07:00

These are a fwe newspaper clippings that Fr. Kestermeir sent me in an email. The first one reminds me of something Ricky and Clay would have put in the paper if they'd had the money. Am I right?

I watched A Charlie Brown Christmas at 4AM last night, unfathomably/gloriously stoned

2008-07-22T16:38:00.000-07:00

"Whither Shermy?" by Ivan Brunetti, from McSweeney's and his oversized and wonderful Schizo #4.

The letters column entitled "Dear Asshole" from Schizo #3 (1998) includes this letter to Ivan Brunetti:

"While Jim Woodring predicts you will move on to do amazing humanist work, I predict you will fade away like the mediocre shit you are! Pathetic losers like you piss me off becauase your rants steal all the attention away from folks out there who are honestly trying to say something interesting and wondrous about life. You suck.

Zero Benjamin
Brookline, Massachusetts

P.S. Please kill yourself."

Jim Woodring was right. Ivan Brunetti is living proof that the time you spend in your emotional gutter is as important as the summer evenings on your porch, sippin' on gin and juice.

What is aversion? What is attraction? Is aversion to "external" stimuli really an arrow aimed at the parts of ourselves we label undesirable?

What causes you to label people good or bad? Are there pieces of yourself you are proud of? Other pieces you wish did not exist?

You were not made or born to pick and choose elements of yourself as "correct" and discard others. You were born with irises to open, nostrils to open, ears to open, hands to open (even legs to open). I have obstructed natural motion by curling, folding into myself, making a shell, building a Berlin Wall around my heart. It's time to knock it down. The pure heart (called bodhichitta in the Buddhist tradition) we've tried to bury is not in danger of being damaged. It is only our fear of pain or intrusion that has caused us to truly suffer.

Have you ever noticed the difference when you just sit up straight and breathe? When you stop talking? Did you remember how it felt when you asked someone to listen, and they quickly deposited their own advice and their own experiences?

I am learning to go to a movie or read a comic book without wondering if I like it or if the quality of the work is poor or strong. All my life I have been unable to do this. This was an externalizing of the way I looked in the mirror. I wonder where I learned it. It was easy to do but hard on me, as I'm sure it's been hard for you when you have turned that harsh eye on yourself.

Your loneliness, fear, anger, pride, crazed feelings, lust, confusion -- they are your good friends in disguise. See them for who they are: pals pointing the way to discover the softness of your heart and its power to connect you with the suffering of others.

You are all geniuses, kind and warm and hurt geniuses. (Abby kept calling her friends geniuses and I picked up on it. I believe she is more on than she even knows.)

I count myself as very blessed to be around you, even for a moment or a day. I am blessed that you are reading this writing, and that very real human beings read my comics.

Your perceptions do more than color your world; they shape it. For real, too. The energy you send out returns to you tenfold.

Just relax and be where you are.

Further reading: Pema Chödrön

Fellow Minnow's, share the love of fish

2008-07-22T12:14:00.000-07:00

AFTER READING THIS POST, I CHALLENGE YOU TO SUBMIT TO O!NO,MN WITH THE THEME OF "FISH SPA" OR "DOCTOR FISH." ENJOY.

Anybody seen the advertisement for the PedEgg, a thing that collects all your dead skin from your feet. You have to empty it, and you see tons of white flakes pour from this little egg. It makes me ashamed to be a human. Anywho, now there's a better way!

This is a story I'm working on for the P-I, but for now enjoy the YouTube video and AP story.

Ready for the latest in spa pampering? Prepare to dunk your tootsies in a tank of water and let tiny carp nibble away.

Fish pedicures are creating something of a splash in the D.C. area, where a northern Virginia spa has been offering them for the past four months. John Ho, who runs the Yvonne Hair and Nails salon with his wife, Yvonne Le, said 5,000 people have taken the plunge so far.

"This is a good treatment for everyone who likes to have nice feet," Ho said.

Continue reading the AP story here

this post might make you angry

2008-07-20T02:33:00.000-07:00

when you see the Joker in the new Batman movie, he looks back at you, and he's alive. his heart of real kindness is pulsing. is this why I am an artist? no, no, no. but you? yes. it's because of you.

I am blessed to be around young people all day long.

thank you! I love you!

ps. I've read me a lotta related comic books and I've never read a Joker with as much to it as this one. he breathes like Jimmy Dean, like Max Schreck.

Yo, Abby and Bob: this means I like you

2008-07-19T00:14:00.000-07:00

This is Abby's real fort. I believe it's 16 feet long, hand printed, stitched with love:

This is my version of her fort. 22 inches long, complete with crysalus and such:
This is Bob's Superman. Drawn in my journal, for me because I think he loves me:

This is my version of Bob's Superman, which I photocopied and watercolored. Drawn as a portrait of a man, and his truest thoughts:

What Is The Chemical Nature of O!NO, MN?

2008-07-17T21:23:00.000-07:00

O oxygen
N nitrogen
Mn manganese

(free oxygen) O + (nitrogen monoxide) NO + (manganese) Mn = ONOMn (ionic compound)

some of my faves

2008-07-16T12:02:00.000-07:00

Phoolan Devi

Liz

Bjork

Jane Goodall

Emma Goldman

The Nebraska Sandhills

2008-07-16T11:28:00.000-07:00

The Nebraska sandhills are the largest dune field in North America. The once actively shifting hills of sand now lay dormant, stabilized by grasses. Ever been there? I'm in love with it. Completely golden in the winter and green in the summer.

Standing atop a one hundred foot dune, the wind blows reminding me of the winds that blew these mounds of sand around for thousands of years. Windmills and barbed wire fences dot the landscape while the rest is free from tool or pesticide.

Much of Nebraska has been torn, leveled, monocropped, sprayed, and stripped of all things beautiful, free, and natural. Why? Because people want lots of beef. It's true. Two percent of the tall grass prairie remains. That means 98% of Nebraska has been misappropiated by machines. Because sand is not a prime spot to grow crops, the sandhills have been used primarily by ranchers. The grazing of cattle does have an impact on biodiversity of plant life as well as other erosional factors but next to the rest of the state, this land is almost a relict. A representation of the land in which buffalo once roamed and Indian hunted; land that was stolen and settled by Europeans, one of whom was my great-grandfather Heinrich in 1914 by way of the Homestead Act.

Don't be lazy! The first dune is only three hours northwest of Omaha.

Our Origin

2008-07-11T13:15:00.000-07:00

Theia is believed to be a mars-size planet that existed 4billion years ago, right around the same time O!NO,MN came into existence. It is believed that it collided with the earth in an event that allowed the creation of the Moon, and thus the Moon chapter of O!NO,MN. Not to mention waves. Twist your brains like their wormholes and consider this a kick-off point for our logo. We need to create a history book from our Origin tO nOw. We alsO need tO capitalize every O we use. lovesies-

Do the Jake Walk, do do do do do do do

2008-07-09T19:00:00.000-07:00

Molly's little contribution.

ONOMINNY BEGINNY

2008-07-08T21:21:00.000-07:00

Preface: I was in danger of coming down with the Jake walk as a nineteen year old when I lifted five million pounds, and i only weighed four. So I am well well versed on the fear and pain associated with it, however, that will never deter me from chronically binging on TOCP. Moving on, I have not yet uploaded the miges (short for internet-quality-reduced i"mages" prounounced "meyeyeyeyeyeyeygas") however, I have been brainstorming for the drawage, and the productions following ONOMINNOW BEGINNOW will follow shortly. Much love.
p.s. Im still looking for Robin Thicke, I'm gonna make that doodoo a newdoo>"

some serious jake walking

2008-07-07T09:24:00.001-07:00

"In 1930, large numbers of jake users began to lose the use of their hands and feet. Some victims could walk, but they had no control over the muscles which would normally have enabled them to point their toes upward. Therefore, they would raise their feet high with the toes flopping downward, which would touch the pavement first followed by their heels. The toe first, heel second pattern made a distinctive “tap-click, tap-click" sound as they walked."

I'm gonna give to Mary with love

2008-07-05T14:22:00.000-07:00

I'm gonna put it right in her hand
'Cause I know she'll stoke it so grand.

Drawn by MOLLY MULLEN
from the second story of Seattle.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT: JAKE WALK BLUES

2008-07-05T14:05:00.001-07:00

my dear minnows:

Jamaican Ginger Extract (known in the United States by the slang name Jake) was an early 20th century patent medicine that provided a convenient way to bypass Prohibition laws, since it contained between 70-80% ethyl alcohol by weight.

It was all well and good, until a pair of amateur chemists and bootleggers, Harry Gross and Max Reisman, tried to market this product. To do so, and to make it more palatable, they mixed it with tri-o-tolyl phosphate (also known as tri-ortho cresyl phosphate or TOCP), that was able to pass the Treasury Department's tests but preserved jake's drinkability.

TOCP was originally thought to be non-toxic; however, it was later determined to be a neurotoxin that causes axonal damage to the nerve cells in the nervous system of human beings, especially those located in the spinal cord. The resulting type of paralysis is now referred to as organophosphate-induced delayed neuropathy, also known as the JAKE WALK. (from wikipedia, somewhat altered.)

I challenge you to use this story as a jumping off point for a drawing, comic, etc. GO TO WORK.

Dees Peeps

2008-07-03T08:44:00.000-07:00

Two eyeballs per person, no exception exceptin' the mutants in da place known as Chernobyl-radioactive-boar-reserve. These be the tools that sync with phalanges a trabajar in shapsies and colorsies.

hey yo

2008-07-03T02:14:00.000-07:00

hey yo!
O!No-Mn!!!!!
I love y'all
I almost sorta wish I lived in Omaha
um but really I'm glad I don't
but y'all are makin me almost wish it.
Leslie James
Abby Rebecca
Mishka Garp

daaaaaaamn.
haircut.

Another Dopple, jacking my flowzie.

2008-07-02T21:53:00.000-07:00

Robin Thicke, impersonatin' me, whilst ridin' da bicycle fo mountains in da city. What can ya do in da legal system fo identitee teft? Robin, i'm givin you tree days to take off da mask and da wig else i'm buzzin yo cut.
skinny jim and the merry mercenaries

welcome to the zone.

2008-07-02T21:33:00.001-07:00

O!NO,MN began something like thirty billion years ago, when the earth collided with theia. it became what we now know as the moon, or something like this. this needs to be discussed with james or wikipedia for more information. you should ask him about it.